


A Case of the Bottom

by Ghoulboyboos



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Blow Jobs, Bottom Ryan Bergara, First Time, First time with a man, Getting Together, Intercrural Sex, M/M, negotiation, not really a negotiation of kinks more of cliches and preferences
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-09 02:46:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17398547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghoulboyboos/pseuds/Ghoulboyboos
Summary: “Don’t be such a silly little boy.”Ryan’s shout of protest is halfway out of his throat when it gets stuck. His face flushes hot and something else coils under his belly button as he watches Shane turn away to grab his box again. His co-host is not looking back at Ryan, instead he takes long strides down the hallway with the props and Ryan nearly chokes trying to dislodge the remark in his throat. It’s nonsense. It’s unprecedented. It’s frankly ridiculous.But Ryan, who up to this point was absolutely sure that he was comfortably straight, has the worst boner in his life since puberty.And he is pretty sure that Shane’s comment is to blame for it.Fuck.





	A Case of the Bottom

**Author's Note:**

> This is kind of based on this story/screenshot
> 
> [Here](http://punchcardalchemist.tumblr.com/post/181258242856/me)
> 
> And also because the whole top/bottom discourse happens sometimes in ships and I think it's super silly because that's... not how most queer relationships work but okay. This was mostly written for fun and I hope you guys are going to have fun reading it :P

Ryan glares at the stack of boxes with props, hoping that maybe, if he puts just enough heat in his evil eye, they could somehow disintegrate on the spot and he would solve the problem for BUN and everyone involved. But they stay put, stacked just a little too high for his comfort because of course they would do that. He’s not even below average height and somehow there are so many tall people around him who love to make his life harder. There are people on the internet who are genuinely surprised whenever he hangs out with someone who isn’t ten feet tall.

 

“Ryan is taller than Kelsey?” They would ask, a series of shocked emoticons following the question and Ryan rolls his eyes at the memory. He is taller than quite a few people, thank you very much, his problem is just that he’s hanging out with the absolute giant of a man Shane Madej who would make Bigfoot look dainty.

Said giant just picked one of the boxes – from the low stacked ones, of course, as if to tease Ryan – and passes by him with a little smile that makes Ryan grit his teeth. He would show the big guy.

Ryan isn’t exactly sure what he will show him and why, because while Shane sometimes makes quips about his height, Ryan gives back just as good and they are not _really_ fighting about it in any way. They are just… having good banter.

 

Ryan rolls up his sleeves because he works hard for these arms to look good and grabs one of the boxes, determined to march right by Shane, shoulders back, carrying the props, his head and his self esteem high. It works for about fifteen seconds before his foot gets caught on some loose carpeting and he stumbles past Shane before falling flat on the ground, the box dropping out of his hands and falling over. It doesn’t spill its contents, thankfully, but Ryan’s elbows and chin hurt where he hit the ground since he didn’t have his hands to catch himself. He waits for Shane to burst into howling laughter, but the big guy simply puts his own box down next to Ryan and grabs him by fisting a hand in the back of Ryan’s shirt. He pulls hard enough to allow Ryan to get on his knees before scrambling to his feet and when he looks up he sees that Shane is indeed laughing, just a lot more subdued with his shoulders shaking and his lips pressed together. His eyes are shining with mirth as he brushes off the front of Ryan’s shirt with a large palm and before Ryan can slap him away or make a quip, he says: “Ryan, Ryan…” with an exasperated shake of his head and a soft laugh.

 

“Don’t be such a silly little boy.”

 

Ryan’s shout of protest is halfway out of his throat when it gets stuck. His face flushes hot and _something else_ coils under his belly button as he watches Shane turn away to grab his box again. His co-host is not looking back at Ryan, instead he takes long strides down the hallway with the props and Ryan nearly chokes trying to dislodge the remark in his throat. It’s nonsense. It’s unprecedented. It’s frankly _ridiculous_.

But Ryan, who up to this point was absolutely sure that he was comfortably straight, has the worst boner in his life since puberty.

And he is pretty sure that Shane’s comment is to blame for it.

 

_Fuck._

 

-

 

The boner goes down eventually, but Ryan still makes a point of carrying the boxes in a specific way so that any possible bulges would be hidden away. He also finds that he has trouble looking Shane in the eye and once the props are gone and Ghoul HQ is free for renovations, he flees to the Buzzfeed cafeteria to grab a coffee and maybe pray for someone to drag him to a video where you were allowed to get stupid drunk.

 

Sadly, there are no producers lurking and collecting people for videos in the area, so Ryan just gets his hot caffeinated beverage and sits down on a bench to fret and overthink a bit.

He stares at the stains that long ago have become part of the linoleum at Buzzfeed, trying to find an answer to his current crisis as if he could somehow interpret the spots of old coffee and god-knows-what the way others read tea leaves. Ryan really doesn’t want to have a “gay crisis” because the thought makes him squirm. Not only does it sound mean and homophobic, but he also was _so sure_ with what he was doing in life. He’s been friends with guys his whole life, he’s been in a frat, he _lives with guys_ for fuck’s sake and he never had something happen with these people that caused him to fall into – he flushes – _lust_ like that. Ryan and his friends talk a lot of shit and it’s not a real friendship if you don’t make a sexual comment once in a while and he can not remember that his dick ever reacted any of that. Now, however, a single sentence from Shane had caused him to nearly get himself in trouble for an HR violation and he’s just… _so confused._

Ryan sighs as he rolls the empty paper cup between his palms, staring at the last drops of dark liquid sloshing around inside. Maybe it wasn’t a “gay thing”, maybe he just had a thing for being belittled. Maybe the shame of falling on his face had caused him to pop a boner and Shane’s comment was just accidentally happening at the same time. He thinks about it. He thinks about Shane calling him “silly little boy” and his ears start to burn. Ryan smacks a hand to his face and groans.

 

“You look terrible, sweetheart. No offense.”

 

Ryan squints up knowing his face is probably half a grimace because his thoughts are now running so wild that his head is starting to hurt. He doesn’t exactly have to look up to know that it’s Curly, but he looks at him anyway.

 

“Hey man.”

“Heeey.” Curly sounds surprisingly soft and careful as he sits down next to Ryan. He gives a long look at the crumpled up paper cup in Ryan’s hand and takes it carefully from him, pinching a corner between his fingertips and gingerly placing it on the edge of the bench.

“So.” He starts conversationally and Ryan stares ahead because if he looks over at Curly he’s probably going to laugh or smile and that will lower his defenses. “Tell your Papá Curly your woes.” He’s thrown one leg over the other and interlinked his fingers on his knee, leaning back like they are in a high school comedy gossiping about cute boys.

Ryan sighs and it actually turns in half a laugh when he settles.

“I… don’t know how to put this delicately.”

Curly nearly _squirms_ next to Ryan and he can practically see the gleaming eyes, even though he is still staring at the ground.

“Oh _my_ , a delicate matter. What did you do, handsome? It’s not something to run to HR over, is it?”

Ryan groans and rubs his face, ignoring the sound Curly makes which sounds like he might squeal for dramatics if he had been on camera. Curly is a good friend, though and a nice man, so instead he simply laughs a bit and puts his hand on Ryan’s shoulder.

“Come on, I know you, papi, you wouldn’t do anything bad.”

That makes Ryan sigh and finally look at Curly. He has crumpled so much into himself that his face is leaning against his arm and Curly has to bend over on the bench quite a bit to look at him. His eyes are still shining with amusement, but he is smiling and it looks kind, open. Supportive, even.

Ryan sighs once more.

 

“I discovered something about myself, earlier. Something happened. Well not really happened, it was just…” He starts again. “Shane was...”

When he doesn’t continue, Curly raises his eyebrows.

“A lot to unpack with Shane, huh? There… is a lot of him, I mean. And if I can believe the occasional picture of his in tight chinos, there is a lot to unpack in _that_ area too. Midwestern boys, you know.”

Ryan flushes and he hasn’t expected to actually blush at the thought of Shane’s dick but now he does and that’s a whole other situation.

“Fuck.” He curses quietly. “Curly please, you can’t tell _anyone._ Please.”

“Ay, two “pleases”? Alright, alright.” He makes a motion to zip his mouth shut and shuffles a bit closer so his hip is touching Ryan’s. “I’ll not rat you out, I promise.”

“Thank you, man.” Ryan says softly, rubbing his eyes.

 

And then he tells Curly everything. The way he got a little agitated at the thought of Shane laughing at him, how Shane didn’t even have to do anything to make him fumble and trip. How embarrassed he felt only to have it replaced by hot, sharp arousal. The fact that he got _hard_ over Shane calling him “little boy”, how he wonders what that means, means for him, means for _them_ and how terrifying it all is. He nearly falls into a litany of “I’m not gay, I’m not”, but he’s grown since his fratboy days of “No Homo”, so he simply mutters about never having any sexual or romantic thoughts about men and Curly, bless his soul, simply nods with a calm and serious expression. Finally, Ryan finishes with his “woes” as Curly put them.

“So what does that mean? Am I … into Shane like that? Or am I just into the thought of being degraded? What the fuck does this mean? Is it his size- I mean height?”

Curly’s lip twitches at Ryan’s little slip up but he doesn’t comment on it. Instead, he switches legs, throwing one over the other again and strokes his beard, jewelry on his neck clinking as he weighs his head. Ryan stares into space, sometimes tracing Curly’s hand tattoos with his eyes because they are something to look at.

 

“It’s just the kink, right?” He says, voice pathetically weak. “I’m not g- I’m not bi or anything, right?”

Curly’s eyes sharpen at that and Ryan cringes, realizing he sounds like a dick. Before he can tell Curly to forget it, his friend sits up.

 

“Ryan.” His voice is sweet and vaguely pitying and it puts Ryan even more on edge. Curly puts an arm around him and shakes his head, tutting slightly and suddenly, Ryan feels like he’s being made fun of.

“Ryan, Ryan, Ryan. My poor baby. Listen to Dr. Curly because I’ve seen a _lot_ and I know exactly what’s happening here.”

Before Ryan can even start to call Curly out on him not having a doctorate or medical degree, Curly already smacks him straight in the chest with his next comment.

“Ryan Bergara, Dr. Curly diagnoses you with _Bottom._ ”

 

-

 

After the first shock, Curly is a little kinder with Ryan. He assumes it’s because of him freaking out over being into “gay stuff” that Curly felt like he needs a bit of punishment and Ryan guesses that that’s fair. Still, his talk with Curly helps, even if it gets his nerves up even more.

 

So he ends up lying in bed that night, on his back, rerunning the moment from when he stumbled and fell, the rumble in Shane’s voice, the way he could tell that his tongue curled around the “silly” and “little” like all he would focus on were a couple of L’s and Ryan is ready to take the L in this one. Just thinking of the moment gets him to flush. Shane’s grip on the back of his shirt and the surprising strength with which he had pulled Ryan up. The heat of Shane’s palm against the front of his chest. There is heat on Ryan’s face, too and under his collar. He’s only in his boxers under the blanket and he feels himself swell against the silky fabric. His dick is definitely interested.

 

“ _Try thinking about it. Try thinking about Shane. It’s the easiest way to figure out if you’re into it. At least in theory.”_

 

Curly had been pretty blunt and while Ryan doesn’t _like_ the idea of jerking off to Shane, he considers it right now, because that would once and for all tell him the truth. If his thoughts strayed to some pretty girl or a former encounter while he was getting more heated, then maybe it was just the humiliation. If the thought of Shane actually could get him off… well, then he had a whole new problem he would address when he got to it.

 

For now, he presses a palm to his mouth and closes his eyes, forcing himself to imagine Shane’s image. His lanky form, how tall he is when he is standing close to Ryan, how he hovers over him when he helps strapping a camera to Ryan’s chest. How warm he is if they sleep in the same bed, even with a pillow wall between them.

His cock swells against his hand and Ryan whimpers, feeling defeated already. He runs his fingers over the bulge in his boxers and imagines Shane lying next to him, reaching under the covers to touch him and his hips actually _lurch_ up at the thought, trying to press harder into his hand.

 

“Fuck.” He groans and hooks a thumb into the waistband to pull his underwear down. Ryan thinks about the comment again. Silly little Ryan Bergara, needing a big, strong person to take care of him. He curls his hand around his erection – because by now he is pretty much completely hard – and whines at the relief of finally touching himself. _Bottom_ , Curly had called him and Ryan knows there is more to it in Curly’s eyes than just wanting to get fucked. Tops tended to be the more active part, right? Ryan bites his lip as he thinks about Shane’s hands on his clothes again, this time tugging his shirt up and over his head, leaving Ryan’s chest bare and then undressing him until Ryan is on his back, underneath Shane.

 

Ryan kicks off the covers because it’s getting too hot, he is sweating at the thoughts in his brain but he can’t stop himself. His fingers start to stroke his cock, rubbing over the swollen head to gather precum. Ryan is _leaking_ and while it’s not uncommon for him, he could imagine that it’s worse than usual. What would Shane do to him if Ryan let him? Would he allow Ryan to touch himself or would he pin him down, denying him the pleasure?

With another whine, Ryan reaches up and tangles the fingers of both hands into the headboard of his bed, stretching out. He closes his eyes and thinks about Shane’s much taller body hovering over him, looking at him, deciding where to touch, how to tease. His hips cant up but there is nothing to grind against and Ryan feels frustrated already. What kind of lover was Shane, even? If he was into guys, what would he do to Ryan? Touch him? Kiss him? Ryan bites his bottom lip again, feeling how raw it already is. He wouldn’t mind trying to kiss the big guy if they are already naked in bed and touching. Sex without kissing would be weird to him. And… Oh. Would Shane try to fuck him?

 

He glances down to where his cock smears precum against his belly and spreads his legs a little. Ryan has let a girl finger him before, just two of her slim fingers with the promise that it would make things a lot more intense and… she hadn’t been wrong about it, exactly. But Ryan wasn’t used to it, not really, especially not when it came to pushing further. Sure, maybe it was a lingering trace of the way he grew up and his view on – he cringes, mentally apologizing to Curly – _gay stuff_. But right now, he feels like he could try.

So he does. He lets go of the headboard and grabs the lube he stashed in his bedside table. Ryan pours a good amount in his palm and caps the bottle before lubing up his middle finger to start. If Curly was right about the bottom thing, then this should probably be enjoyable. If it was terrible or just “eh”, then at least that was a point against the bottom theory.

Right?

 

Ryan has no fucking idea if he’s honest but he decides to try anyway, spreading his legs to reach down between them, past his cock and his balls. He smears some of the lube against his taint while reaching closer and it’s cold and weird, making him squirm. But the first press of the pad of his finger against his ass isn’t quite as uncomfortable and as he starts out making careful, massaging circles against the muscle, he feels an excited tingle in his stomach. He huffs a little breath as he starts rubbing with two fingers, the pads teasing the rim of his ass while the lube is warming up. With just a bit of pressure, the tip of his middle finger sinks in and there is not even a sting that would allow him to just back out of it. It’s hot inside of him and he feels himself clench around the fingertip already, but there is a part of him – and maybe it’s his determination for success – that wants to push this further, so he continues. Carefully. His finger slides deeper and he can’t help but groan at the penetration. It’s strange but exciting and his toes curl and uncurl as he slowly starts to thrust his finger in and out, spreading the lube inside. He pulls out just for a second to apply more lube from his palm and then he pushes in again, two fingers this time and the stretch makes his belly flip.

 

_Oh._

 

He swallows as his hips push down against his fingers. Over the course of the last couple of minutes, his erection has flagged a little, but now his cock twitches anyway, so whatever he is doing does have an effect on him. Ryan can’t help but think about what that means and if he is even doing it right. Then he frowns at his own ceiling, his fingers stilling inside of him. People kept telling him he was overthinking everything and worrying his head off and he knew they were right. Getting into your head when jacking off was the worst possible thing, in fact, Ryan did usually jerk one out if he had to relax and get his mind off of things for a bit. And here he was, wracking his brain while trying to finger himself. No wonder he’s a mess! No wonder Curly laughed at him. Or Shane, Shane also likes to laugh at him.

Ryan’s cheeks flush at that. Shane probably wouldn’t laugh at him trying out new things, but he would be amused that Ryan got so caught up in thinking he was lying around in bed with his fingers in his ass wondering why the hell he couldn’t switch off. Maybe that’s why Curly said he was the bottom type. Maybe he needed someone to take initiative and fuck his brains out. Ryan bites the wrist of his free hand, stifling a needy whine. Why was the thought of _that_ getting him so worked up?

He wiggles his fingers inside of him, watching his cock twitch once more. Shane’s fingers would reach deeper, he thinks, unbidden. They are long and slim and perfect for something like this. His angle would be different, reaching inside of Ryan with determination and just the right amount of pressure. And Shane would probably love to take him apart under that scrutinizing gaze of his, usually reserved for the moments when Ryan would show him EVPs for the show. Ryan’s hips stutter down and his hole swallows his fingers up to the second knuckle, making him shiver. God, that was weird, but if he closed his eyes he could imagine Shane’s face, his concentrated expression, one arm reaching down to open him up. Ryan spreads his legs a little more and that changes the angle a bit, allowing him to rub his fingertips more intently against the walls of his insides.

 

And then he finds it, the sweet spot, the p-spot, the prostate, whatever people call it. All he knows is that there is a different texture under his fingertips and when he presses down, the area under his stomach coils hot and incredible and he twitches. It’s strange and amazing at the same time and as he starts to massage it, his cock starts to leak even more and while he isn’t sure what he’s doing, he doesn’t really want to stop. Shane is still in his head, the echo of “silly little boy” and his soft laugh stuck in Ryan’s mind on repeat like a broken record and he finally allows his mouth to fall open with a needy moan. Ryan’s always been a bit loud in bed and as he reaches down with his other hand to rub the rest of the lube over his cock and starts to jerk himself, he can’t help but groan. For a bit, he rocks against his fingers, jerking himself in time with the thrusts inside of him while in his mind, above him, Shane edges him on, watches, sees him coming undone at careful touches and before Ryan knows it, he’s tensing up, coiling in on himself and nearly sobbing as he tightens around his fingers, twitching as he comes all over his chest and hand. For a couple of seconds he just rides out the orgasm, thrusting his fingers deep and then the tension leaves him and he collapses, pulling his fingers out and dropping into a starfish pose on the bed, breathing heavily.

 

_Fuck._

 

“So much for that.” He whispers, sucking in another desperate breath. The thought of Shane touching him, maybe even _fucking_ him just got him off and Ryan has no idea what to do with the information, mostly because his brain is mush and he’s not entirely sure he will ever be able to overthink something again. The only half-coherent thought he can form scared the crap out of him earlier, but in the sweet haze of post-orgasmic delight, he can almost live with it:

Apparently, he’s not as straight as assumed.

 

-

 

It’s awkward afterwards. Ryan spends the rest of the evening with cleaning up – and he’s not sure if he got rid of _all_ the lube – and the next day with avoiding Shane. It isn’t exactly easy with their desks right next to each other but Ryan finds reason to run around the office a bit, hand-deliver stuff he could send per e-mail and catching up on his own physical mail for once.

 

Then he goes home and this time he’s so on edge that he goes straight for his bedroom. He ends up on his stomach, holding his pillow close with one arm to smother the noises he is making as he fingers himself open again. His eyes are shut tight as he thinks of Shane, of his hands, his body, his _fucking voice_ teasing Ryan as he works him open and Ryan desperately grinds his hips against the mattress, rutting and feeling the sheet getting wet with his precum. It’s like a whole new door of sex opened for him, a door he cracked open a bit once and while he liked what he saw, he clearly didn’t notice the huge metaphoric arrows pointing to it to indicate how much he would actually be into it. Maybe it _was_ a Shane thing after all.

Ryan cries out into his pillow and comes all over his stomach and the sheets. His fingers slip out of him but he feels how his ass tries to clench around nothing, almost as if it wants to suck them back inside and Ryan shudders and pulls his pillow over his head to hide from the world, not caring that he smears it with lube and that he is face-down-ass-up to avoid lying in his own spunk. Part of him wants to call Curly and ask if there was a way back from discovering the joys of anal, but he is pretty sure Curly would just laugh at him.

He’s still breathing hard and has started shivering because the sweat on his body is starting to cool, but Ryan can’t move. He wants to hide in his nest of shame for a while. Not because he plays with his ass - he’s sure more straight guys like that kind of thing, more than they would like to admit - but for making himself come over thoughts of _Shane_. It’s borderline creepy or maybe even full on creepy and Ryan doesn’t like it. Shane is his best friend and they are open and honest with each other. Jerking off while you imagine your friend slash co-host fucking you is definitely crossing a line and Ryan sighs deeply and slowly moves the pillow and sits up. His ass barely stings, he’s gone slow and careful despite his eagerness and has again used _so_ much lube. Part of him wonders if he could take Shane’s cock and the shame comes back full force, causing him to spring up, tear the sheets off the bed and run for the bathroom.

 

After a shower and a proper clean up, he feels a little less bad and Ryan drops on his freshly made bed in sweatpants and a t-shirt and orders some food on his phone before checking his messages. Maybe he should text Shane something. He can’t exactly write “Hey man just had an intense JO session thinking about you pounding my ass”, but maybe he can drop a hint about his new obsession. Of course Ryan would much rather hide it away forever and never mention it, but Shane deserves some honesty. Even if it hurts.

He has to approach the topic in some way, but first he has to think of a way to get him and Shane in a relaxed and private situation. A time and place where you can mention deeply personal things like the recent developments in your sex-life. Actually, Ryan isn’t sure if there is a real time and place for it but tomorrow morning at the office is definitely not it.

 

So, in order to make things a little bit easier, he decides to fortify and ask Shane out on a date.

 

-

 

Ryan’s problem is that he tends to always take the easy way out. This time, the easy way out includes that he asked Shane to see a movie with him, intending it to be a date, but “forgetting” to mention that it is one. He simply said that he had two tickets to see an action flick and asked if Shane would like to tag along. That wasn’t asking someone out and Ryan knows it, but then again, he has no idea how guys ask out guys and he is not talking to Curly about this whole mess _again_. Not for now, at least.

 

For now, they are watching some nonsense movie with a lot of explosions, people jumping out of or onto or _into_ vehicles and many, many guns. It’s mindless and stupid and Shane is giggling at the more ridiculous moments and normally Ryan would giggle along but since his new… obsession he got more aware of how fucking _cute_ Shane is when he is so amused. It’s a little alarming how fluttery his stomach feels. Lust and kinks are one thing, but Ryan is starting to suspect that his feelings get a bit muddled up, since Shane is his best friend and he trusts him and they are close enough to know each other’s favorite jokes and what they like, how to make the other laugh or smile and…

Ryan could sigh, both annoyed and forlorn while looking at Shane’s face like a lovestruck idiot, but he prefers to stuff his face with popcorn instead. It’s less pathetic. The movie helps a little. Sure, the plot is dumb and definitely not worth the money Ryan blew on the tickets, but Shane’s amusement and loose smiles are worth it, so Ryan shuts up and tries to enjoy it.

 

Afterwards Ryan finds himself in the awkward position of wanting to invite Shane over but not in the usual way. Normally they would kick back with a beer and more popcorn to watch something else. Or they would just talk. But tonight, Ryan had actual plans about inviting Shane into his space and it makes him nervous. Nervous enough to just chew on the inside of his cheek without saying anything.

 

“That was good, dumb fun.” Shane says, chucking the empty popcorn bag into a trash bin. “Thank God these tickets were a gift because I would feel bad if you spent money on them.”

Ryan almost tells him right then and there, but he knows that if he brought up the date situation, he would have to bring up feelings of various kind as well and he just isn’t ready for that, yet. In fact, this is neither the place nor the time. So instead he laughs, maybe a little too hollow, throws his own bag away and turns to Shane.

“True that. You wanna come over and watch something truly spectacular? We could watch Tommy Cruise climb a building.”

Shane’s smiling at him and Ryan curses his inner self for not notifying him earlier that he might have a _thing_ for Shane. Maybe it is the stupid bottom thing or the humiliation as well, but it is definitely standing on a large, fundamental base labeled “Shane” and Ryan feels like the figurative person who doesn’t see the forest for the trees. How long did he actually harbor a thing for Shane? He remembers feeling very happy and relaxed and at ease with the big guy. In a way that he isn’t necessarily with his platonic friends. Maybe his crush for Shane had been what kicked off his sexual awakening. Maybe it was like a sleeper cell of bottom-ness, ready to spring into action the second Shane called him a “silly little boy”. Ryan doesn’t know. Frankly, he realizes he is thinking too much about everything. Shane is watching him with amusement now, clearly aware that Ryan is off fretting in his head, although hopefully not privy to _what_ Ryan is thinking about.

“Sure, little guy.” Shane nudges him a little and Ryan could explode at the contact. “You okay? You look like the popcorn is going to come up again.”  
“I’m fine.” Ryan answers automatically. “Just a lot on my mind. It was a long week.”

Shane lifts his eyebrows a little, but doesn’t comment. He simply gives Ryan’s arm a gentle squeeze and Ryan wants him to leave his hand there and never let go – oh god he is becoming _that_ kind of lovestruck person.

 

-

 

Part of his dilemma is that he wants his first time with Shane to be _special_ , the whole, true, “first time” deal. He wants Shane to be into it, both of them on the same page, all questions answered. He wants to kiss Shane, long and sweet and sappy. He wants the big guy to stay over, even though he keeps joking that Ryan’s bed would be too short for him. It’s kind of dumb, Ryan thinks, but he can’t cringe about it. He really wants this to be good, because Shane is such a big fucking part of his life and the idea of ruining their relationship is more terrifying than any “gay thoughts” he could fuss over. Wanting Shane to fuck him is actually still a very exciting thought, but Ryan has no idea how to bring it up. He tries to think about former relationships, but usually he would go out with girls he was kind-of-friends with, making it obvious which direction he wanted the relationship to go. Ryan and his last girlfriend had been friends before dating, but not the type of friends you spent years of your life and the biggest show in your career with. Shane was a very special friend of Ryan’s, so none of his former dating experience helps him here.

 

So instead, he decides to just go for it, trying his best. He makes some popcorn, just the way he and Shane like it, opens two beers and joins Shane in the living room. The big guy has found Mission Impossible in the list of Ryan’s many online TV subscriptions and is chilling while swiping through his social media. He perks up when Ryan sits down however, and takes one of the beers and the bowl of popcorn. Usually Ryan makes two bowls, underlining his germaphobia about not wanting Shane’s spit in his food, but it would feel hypocritical today. He would very much like to make out with Shane, full on tongue-in-throat making out and complaining about Shane’s fingers in his food seems ridiculous in comparison.

 

The bad thing – or maybe great thing – about sharing the single bowl is that now sometimes their fingers will brush when both of them reach for the kernels at the same time. Ryan always tries to shrug it off, but instead, he feels hot to the core and he _knows_ his face is probably flushing. Shane meanwhile barely does anything but the occasional murmured apology when they knock into each other. They both have seen the film dozens of times, but it still captures their attention and Ryan almost forgets that he intended the night to be a date. It comes back to him by the time the credits roll and he realizes that their drinks and the popcorn is empty, the bowl is on the table and they have slumped enough so that their thighs are pressed together. He tries not to think too much about it, but once he noticed it, it’s impossible (hah) for him to ignore the heat of Shane’s body that seeps through his jeans. It’s too much, but Ryan doesn’t move away. He can’t, even though he is sure he is visibly affected by their closeness. Shane might misinterpret his flush as nervousness or discomfort, but he will definitely notice it and by now, Ryan almost wants Shane to notice, except the thought of explaining to Shane what Ryan had been thinking about lately wants him to pack his things and move to Panama.

 

It would be less embarrassing if Ryan wasn’t blessed/cursed with a very vivid animation. He looks over at Shane and thinks about what it would feel like to kiss him and the thought doesn’t scare him as much as he expects. Instead, his thoughts go on, bring up the image and sensation of Shane’s hand on Ryan’s body, his face above him instead of the blank ceiling of his bedroom while he’s on his back on the bed. Shane’s body settling between his legs and holding him firm and secure. His fingers teasing Ryan’s cock before moving to his hole…

 

Ryan bites his bottom lip and presses his fist to his forehead, closing his eyes and willing the thoughts to go away. It helps a little bit, but of course, it’s not exactly subtle. He just managed to get rid of the fantasy of Shane panting into his ear when the real Shane interrupts his fretting.

“You okay, man?”

 

It’s almost a relief, knowing that his distress is visible enough for Shane to notice. Of course, it’s also embarrassing as fuck, but it means that Ryan finally has a door open to bring _it_ up. He sighs and rubs his face, falling back into the couch. Against the suggestions from his panicky brain, he looks over at Shane. His friend has leaned back as well, one arm over the back of the couch so he can turn to Ryan. There is an expression of kind worry and a bit of curiosity on his face and Ryan thinks about how easy it would be to just reach up, cup his face and kiss him, conveying his wants and needs through a make-out, but Shane deserves more and Ryan doesn’t want to scare him off.

 

“It’s something I got to tell you because otherwise it’ll get too weird, okay?”

Shane pauses for a moment, frowns and lets his eyes wander as if he is trying to look into his own head and take inventory.

“Okay.” He says and Ryan thinks he sounds really careful. “What is it?”

“I think I’m...” Ryan takes a deep breath, steeling himself for saying a truly embarrassing thing. It should be easy, but it’s actually even harder than he anticipated. And of course, in the mess that his thoughts currently are, his words get jumbled, a leap is made and instead of a vague insinuation that he might be into Shane, his mouth betrays him and instead says:

“I think I’m a bottom.”

He doesn’t need to see Shane’s suddenly confused and close-to-laughing face to realize what he actually said. The word “bottom” seems to be ringing in his ears, echoing down the hall, coming back from all floors of the fucking apartment complex and Ryan could scream out loud like he does when paranormal shit happens close to him.

“I… I’m sorry?” Shane blinks a whole lot and Ryan wants to run away but this is _his home_ he kind of has a connection to it.

“I mean- What I mean- That came out wrong oh god let me try again!” Ryan is shaking and it makes him sound like he is laughing while he couldn’t be further away from it. If anything he feels like crying. Shane doesn’t answer, but he doesn’t get up and leave either, so Ryan continues.

“I don’t know why I said that – actually, I do it’s because of Curly but I need to say it differently.” Ryan puts both hands over his eyes. “Shane… Since about a week ago where you called me a “silly little boy” because I fell carrying prop boxes, I realized that I’m kind of into you. In a gay way. Or bi way or whatever.” He peeks at Shane through his fingers but the big guy’s expression is unreadable. “It’s a sexual thing and … maybe romantic too, I don’t know. But you’ve been on my mind since then and Curly called me a bottom and the worst thing is that I think he’s right!”

 

Shane is staring at him for a full ten seconds – Ryan is counting in his head – and by the time he takes a deep breath, Ryan’s nerves have him vibrate in his seat. His fingers are digging into his face like he’s in an actual horror movie.

 

“Okay.” Shane finally begins. “Let me- Let me try to decipher this because I want to make sure I understand right.”

Ryan presses his lips together and nods.

“When I called you a silly little boy, that had an effect on you. In a sexual way.”

Ryan nods again, trying not to think about the way the repetition of those words make him feel.

“So of course, your first instinct was to go to Curly and ask him, probably hoping that he would put your fears to rest and tell you that it’s not a gay thing or whatever...”

This part is embarrassing and Ryan feels himself flush hotly against his palms. He wants to put his fingers over his eyes again but his gaze is glued to Shane’s face.

“I don’t really understand why you thought Curly would somehow analyze the situation and try to make it less “gay”, but either way he probably made a joke at you’re expanse, one that you didn’t quite understand to be a joke because you’re not privy to gay memes and insiders.”

Ryan pauses at that, thinking it over. He’s pretty sure he has seen “gay memes” before, but of course, not really read into it.

“What?”

Shane sighs.

“Ryan… Listen, man. Of course top and bottom and verse are things in the queer community but there are many, many people who think this labeling is kind of bullshit and that people should just have sex the way they like with their consenting partners and not act like we’re straight people sorted into dicks and vaginas.”

“Oh.” Ryan blinks. He has never put too much thought in the whole terms.

“Is that...” He begins carefully. “Is that a bit like going up to a same-sex couple and asking who’s the husband and who’s the wife?”

“A bit, yeah.” Shane would look annoyed but he is smiling at Ryan. His eyes are soft. “Basically, what I’m saying is that there are some jokes and cliche's about how tops act and about how bottoms act and like most cliches, some of them are based in reality but also like most cliches, there are many, many people that don’t fit into that. So… just because you had a… reaction,” his lips twitch, “to me calling you something like that doesn’t mean you’re automatically into guys. Or into me. And it definitely doesn’t put you into a box you don’t want to be in.”

Ryan scowls.

“I know that.” He finally pulls his hands off of his face. “Of course I know that much! I did some… research.” He flushes again.

Shane barks out a laugh, smacking his thigh slightly as he curls into himself with a wheezing attempt to catch his breath.

“Of- of course you did. What was I thinking! Research is your lifeblood- Oh my God, Ryan, I don’t know if I can listen to this in your Unsolved voice, though-”

“Fuck you!” Ryan says, but he’s laughing too. “Do you know how scared I was getting into this? And- and liking it?!”

Shane sucks in a breath and swallows at that.

“Well.” His voice sounds suddenly thick. “That- that is good to know. But… I mean, that doesn’t mean you have to be into me. Just-”

“Listen,” Ryan interrupts. “If it makes you uncomfortable this is the only conversation we will have about it. But- but I’m pretty sure that it’s you. Not just a random idea about trying things with a guy or- or bottoming for a girl or whatever. It’s _you_ and I know that this is an inconvenience and I don’t want to lose you as my friend, so I wanted to be honest with you but also let you know that- You know. I won’t do anything weird around you or make you feel like I would come onto you if you don’t want me to. So. Just… I needed you to know about this, man.” Ryan sighs and rubs his eyes. He feels tired, defeated. “It felt creepy knowing that you don’t know about it.”

 

They are quiet for a moment and Ryan stares at his feet, unsure what to do exactly. He could still run away as fast as he can, but… no, that’s not what will help any of them in this situation. He glances over at Shane and is surprised to see that Shane is _blushing_ , big hands rubbing at his big nose while his cheeks and ears are pink and they look hot to the touch. Ryan almost wants to reach out and feel for himself, but Shane clears his throat and turns to look at him.

 

“Are you sure?”

Now it's Ryan's turn to let out a wheezy little laugh.

“I… trust me man I tried a lot and I made sure I knew what I was doing and… man, yeah. I’m sure.” He sighs a bit. “Sorry.”

“No.” Shane waves his hands around a little. “No, no. Don’t be sorry. I-” He pauses to take a deep breath. “I didn’t realize you even… would at all be interested, I kind of have to deal with that first, now.”

And for the first time since this whole mess started, Ryan pauses and allows himself to sit back, analyze the situation and … hope. He glances over at Shane and takes in his red face, red ears, the worried expression.

“Shane...” He starts carefully. “Would you actually be… interested in me?”

Shane almost snorts and looks at Ryan like he’s insane. His eyes are crinkling at the corners and Ryan could swear he’s almost crying with laughter.

“Ryan, Jesus have you seen yourself? You’re not just handsome or pretty, you’re hot as fuck. You got arms to die for and that hair, that face...” He reaches out for a moment, stopping himself about an inch from Ryan’s face. “Of course I want… of course I’m interested!”

"Oh." Ryan leans back to see Shane's face better but Shane seems to take that differently, because he's pulling his hand away and Ryan nearly cringes because he's not sure what he's doing but he has to try anyway.

"Can I... Uh." He reaches up as if to take Shane's shoulders but only hovering near his arms. "Can I kiss you, maybe?"

Shane looks at him from the corners of his eyes. He looks nervous, fingers of one hand drumming against his knee and the other hand still hovering between them. He twists, however, so that Ryan can take a hold of his shoulders for real.

"If you want to, yeah."

"Shane, how often do I need to say that I want to because this is getting kind of dumb, really." Ryan says and he ignores the little flip in his chest as Shane starts to grin at that. Instead, he leans up and presses a kiss to Shane's lips. It's soft and warm and Ryan thinks about how much he fretted what kissing a guy would be like. Of course it's different, Shane's lips are slimmer and a little chapped and as he tilts his face to kiss him a little deeper, he can feel a little bit of a scrape of stubble. But the feeling... is pretty fucking great. He feels his face heat up as Shane's hands settle on his ribs and slowly stroke down. The palms are broad and warm and almost exactly how Ryan imagined it and he suddenly is aware of how little he's been moving his own hands. Where the hell should he put them? He tentavely reaches out to cup the back of Shane's neck with one, thumb stroking at the fine hair that curls over his fingers. Shane's hair is growing out again, not too long but long enough that Ryan can feel how soft it is. He reaches up with his other hand and cups Shane's jaw, just when Shane's mouth opens a little, enough to let their breaths mingle. It feels oddly intimate, sharing breaths and Ryan whines when Shane's tongue flicks against his lips.

"You okay?" Shane pulls back just a little but his hands settle firm on Ryan's waist and Ryan just nods and tightens his hold on Shane's head to pull him in again. This time, when their mouths meet, the kiss is open and Ryan allows his own tongue to meet Shane's and groans in response. Shane lets out a little moan that seems to vibrate through Ryan's teeth and suddenly, he's janked forward, sliding on Shane's lap with the help of the big guy's hands and it's much more exciting to be manhandled like that than he expected.

"Holy shit." He whispers and Shane laughs, hands flexing and curling into the belt loops of Ryan's jeans.

Making out with Shane while sitting on his lap is surprisingly comfortable and Ryan soon learns that he can grind down on Shane a little which makes the big guy shudder and hold onto him tighter. Shane's hair is thicker than it looks and Ryan enjoys raking his fingers through it, pulling and tugging here and there. Sometimes Shane will twitch and lurch forward as if he wants to devour Ryan and it's incredibly fun to find the spots on Shane's scalp that make the other man whine and beg.

Ryan doesn't want to spend the entire night dry-humping Shane however, so he reluctantly pulls back. Shane has spent the last couple of minutes sucking a very nice hickey on Ryan's neck and Ryan has kept himself busy tugging on Shane's hair whenever his toes curled in his shoes. But now he wants to move on. He cups Shane's face in his hands and kisses him hard, biting at his bottom lip and Shane groans, hands under Ryan's shirt and fingernails dancing over Ryan's spine and ribs.

"Shane-" Ryan sucks in a sharp breath as he grinds down and feels how _hard_ Shane is. "Wanna move this to the bedroom?"

"You sure?" Shane's pupils are huge, his cheeks are red and his hair is a mess, but he seems still in control enough to let his eyes rake over Ryan's face. "We don't have to-"

"Shane." Ryan grabs the other man by his lapels and shakes him a little. "If you don't want that's fine, but I feel like I made it very clear what I want."

Shane hisses but reaches up to hold Ryan's wrists.

"I get that, but fantasy and reality are two different things. I feel like we argue about that a lot. Just because you liked the idea doesn't mean you want the real deal right away."

"If I change my mind I'll tell you." Ryan gets up and pulls Shane with him. "But right now I do want. I really do."

Shane crowds in his space and kisses him again, hand tilting up Ryan's face as his arm wraps around his waist.

"Alright, little guy." Ryan scowls at him, making him laugh. "Lead the way."

 

-

 

They stumble more than walk into the bedroom, hands groping and mouths biting at each other and Shane shoves up Ryan's shirt, waiting long enough for Ryan to lift his arms before pulling it off and tossing it aside. Ryan doesn't want to be the only one shirtless and quickly moves to get Shane equally naked. There is a lot of newly exposed skin in the game now and as Shane pulls him close Ryan enjoys the warm pressure of another body against him. He feels a flutter of nervousness, since Shane is so much bigger than anyone he's ever been before, but it's nervous excitement, not panic. He runs his hands up Shane's back as Shane dips his head to kiss down Ryan's neck and collar bones. A large hand grabs one of Ryan's asscheeks and he yelps against Shane's shoulder, getting a laugh in return.

"Good? Or-"

"New." Ryan suggests, shoving a hand in the back pocket of Shane's jeans. It's a weird angle, since Shane's legs are so long and Ryan has to snake his arm weirdly around Shane's waist, but as he squeezes, he's rewarded with a groan in his ear. "Give me more and I'll tell you how good it is."

“Ryan you don’t have to-”

Ryan reaches up and puts his hand over Shane’s mouth. His friend’s eyes stare at him in surprise, maybe even intrigue and Ryan bites his bottom lip.

“I… I want to. I really do, though. That's not bad, is it?”

Shane blinks and then Ryan can feel him smile against his palm. He shakes his head and pulls back enough to whisper:  
“Of course not.”

  
Ryan isn’t sure if he should feel emboldened or embarrassed and he can’t help but fret a bit. He takes Shane's head in his hands again and searches his face.

"You know, if we're going too fast for _you_ , you have to tell me."

Shane’s fingers curl around his wrists and carefully pull his hands down to kiss them. Shane’s eyes are warm and brown and his smile is relaxed.

“It’s okay. I mean, I didn’t expect it, sure, but that makes it actually even better, because it’s a surprise. I like a good surprise.”

Ryan snorts and shakes his head.

“You’re terrible.”

“And you’re into me.”

Ryan sighs.

"Yeah. God, I really am."

The hungry look Shane gives him at that goes straight to his groin.

 

-

 

They're in no rush. Making out and exploring could probably be an activity for the whole night, but eventually, Ryan ends up on his back on his bed, just how he dreamed, with Shane bracing himself over him to kiss all over his chest. He grabs Ryan's wrists and holds them over his head and Ryan's heart beats a lot faster at that, hands flexing but not pushing against the hold. Shane looks at him with bright eyes.

"God, your arms are to die for." He kisses down one side, over Ryan's chest, where he leaves teasing nips against the skin and back up the other arm. Ryan shifts on the bed, pushing up one knee to carefully grind against Shane's visible erection. He figures Shane might be "proportional", after all, he was the one with the "matching penis" comment and he isn't sure if he's excited or terrified. Maybe a bit of both. Then Shane lets him go and pulls down Ryan's pants and Ryan reaches out to undo Shane's button and fly. Before he can push at the waistband, however, Shane moves his hands away.

"So, what do you want, exactly?"

“Uh.” Ryan swallows and rubs his face a final time before making eye contact with Shane. “I thought about this _so much_ it’s really ridiculous. I kind of want everything. I don't know where to start.”

“Okay.” Shane lets out a little laugh and shakes his head. “I can’t believe you thought I would be somehow not into this.” He reaches out and runs a hand up Ryan’s ribs. “Look at you. You’re gorgeous.”

Ryan coughs to hide his embarrassment.

“Listen, man.” He starts hoarsely. “Just because someone looks good doesn’t mean everyone wants to screw them. I was… worried.” He shuffles on the bed. "So... what should I do? What... how does this work?"

Shane smiles and reaches up to run a hand through Ryan’s hair. “It’s okay, man. You don’t have to be bratty or submissive or sweet or anything you don’t want to be. We can just be us.”

Ryan sighs and drops his head back in the pillows.

“I don’t know how to be me, though.” He mutters. “Not in this situation.”

“It’s alright.” Shane shifts his weight and braces himself over Ryan again. “We can figure it out together."

 

 -

 

They do figure it out together.

As nervous as Ryan is, he feels a spark of pride as he gets Shane to hand him the lube and starts to finger himself open. The big guy looks like he might pass out at the sight, fingers twitching as if he is barely holding himself back from touching. He finally settles on rubbing Ryan's sides and legs, settling the thighs around his hips so Ryan doesn't have to strain them so much. He squeezes at the muscles in Ryan's legs, eyes glued on his fingers that Ryan is pushing into himself. When Ryan passes the lube off to him, Shane fiddles with the cap, hands shaking. He only stops fidgeting when his fingers are generously coated and start to tease the stretched rim of Ryan's ass. Ryan pulls his fingers out and shifts so he can spread his legs more and he sees Shane swallow before he feels fingertips press against him.

Shane's hands are indeed perfect for this. Ryan thinks he could pass out from the feeling of those long fingers inside of him. Shane keeps going slow, peppering kisses over Ryan's legs and hips while he slowly fucks him with his fingers. Ryan can barely string together a sentence when Shane licks up a stripe on the underside of Ryan's cock and then takes him in his mouth. It's a lot, especially since Shane apparently has done this before. Ryan could weep at the feeling of Shane's hot, wet mouth around him and the way his throat spasms when he takes Ryan deep. He doesn't seem to want to push this further, happily sucking and lapping on Ryan's dick, fingers still slowly pumping inside of him and finally Ryan holds out a hand and manages a garbled "wait!". Shane immediately pulls off and looks up, reaching out with his free hand to stroke Ryan's arm.

"Something wrong? Should I stop?"

Ryan shakes his head.

"Just- I-" He sucks in a breath. "If you keep going I'm gonna come before you even get inside of me and I-" He shivers as Shanes fingers push inside of him again.

"It's alright, Ryan. We don't have to do that tonight."

"I- I wanted-" Ryan closes his eyes as Shane leans up and kisses his forehead.

"I know. I want it, too. But not tonight. You're not ready, yet." He twists his fingers as if to underline his statement and Ryan whines.

"But... I want you to feel good, too." He opens his eyes again and looks at Shane, sees his eyes fill with emotion and his expression melt into a sappy smile.

"I feel good, Ryan. I want to see you, want to make you come." He pushes his fingers deeper again and Ryan grabs his shoulders.

"Fuck."

"Can I make you come?"

Ryan really, really wants to say: "I don't know, can you?" but his brain is mush and his tongue is disconnected from his brain, so he just nods desperately, eyes locked on Shane's face and then Shane gets his free hand around Ryan's cock and starts to jerk him off and Ryan sucks the skin on the side of Shane's neck between his teeth and whines as he comes between them, rocking down hard against Shane's fingers.

He's sprawled out on the sheets, trying to think of a way to repay Shane for a truly, mind-blowing orgasm but Shane has already crawled over him again, kissing him, breathing against Ryan's lips.

"Ry, babe-" He sucks in a sharp breath as Ryan reaches down and gets a hand around his hardness. "Can I fuck your thighs?"

Ryan really isn't going to deny him that, not with the way Shane has lavished his legs with attention earlier. He figures, that there is a lot more he can now experience than just buttsex, even though he definitely still wants to try that. But when Shane slicks up his legs and slides his cock between them, body braced over Ryan so he can look at him as he slowly moves between his muscular thighs, breathing out Ryan's name against his palm as Ryan reaches up to cup Shane's face- God, Ryan could do this for hours.

He holds onto Shane as the other man comes apart, whispers encouragements and compliments into his ear, kisses over his temple and cheek and jaw until Shane collapses at his side, breathing hard and blindly reaching out to entangle his fingers with Ryan. They are both gross, covered in lube and their own sperm and Ryan really, really wants to take a shower. Preferably with Shane. But right now, he's too stunned.

"Fucking hell, dude." He whispers and Shane allows himself a slight chuckle before he opens his eyes a little to look at him.

"You okay, Ryan?" He sounds calm and relaxed, but Ryan can hear the slight twinge of worry in his tone.

"Yeah. Fuck. More than okay. It's just... you didn't even call me a silly little boy this time. I completely forgot about that shit."

Shane wheezes and rolls over to bury his face against Ryan's shoulder, holding onto him as he shakes with laughter and Ryan can't help it, he starts laughing, too.

"We can do that some other time. We got a lot of stuff to try." Shane blinks up at him and Ryan feels his heart lurch at the sleepy expression. He half expected Shane to get sultry about the suggestion of fucking in a variety of ways, but Shane looks so... affectionate that Ryan has to reach out and stroke his hair again. Shane sighs and cuddles closer, ignoring the various sticky substances clinging to their skin in favor of holding Ryan close. Ryan thinks he might explode. In a good way.

"Alright." He finally says. "How about the first thing we try is a shower. And some fresh sheets."

Shane rubs his face against Ryan's collarbone, but then rolls over to sit up. "Alright. Let's do that." He reaches out for Ryan's hand and helps him out of bed, both of them still tangling together once they are standing.

 

-

 

"By the way, what's the verdict?" Shane asks as he ruffles Ryan's hair dry with a towel.

"Verdict?" Ryan combs it out of his face, not missing the way Shane looks at his messy hair with open adoration.

"Was it a bi thing or a me thing? Or a case of the "bottom"?" Shane does airquotes around the last word, grinning widely.

Ryan could tell him to fuck off, but he doesn't. He'll save that for Curly, probably. Instead he steps closer and wraps his arms around Shane's neck, pulling him close.

"I don't know." He says, pretending to mull it over. "I think I will have to do more research before I can settle on a diagnosis."

Shane snorts and leans in to steal a kiss.

"You're such a dork."

"Better than a silly little boy."

"You're that, too."

Ryan scoffs, but laughs as Shane dives in to nuzzle at the side of his neck, mouthing at the skin. He squirms away a bit.

"That wasn't very sexy, this time."

"I can't be sexy 24/7, Ryan. It's a lot of work."

Ryan bursts into a giggle and grabs at Shane's hair to pull him back enoungh so they can look at each other.

"I thought tops were supposed to be on _top_ of their game. All serious and always sexy and brooding and that shit."

"Mmmhhh you see, Ryan." Shane drapes his endless arms around Ryan's back. "That's the thing about same-sex relationships. The whole top and bottom discourse gets really lost outside of the bedroom. And in the bedroom, too, actually. As long as everyone's happy, who cares, really."

"I see." Ryan doesn't even pretend to take it serious. "Thanks so much, Dr. Madej."

"And for the record, if anything, I'm verse. So you better get ready to take some lessons on that as well."

 

Ryan can't be speechless for long, before Shane tries to pick him up to carry him out of the bathroom, only to fail spectacularily, causing both of them to burst into laughter again.

 _This is going to be great,_ Ryan thinks as he tries to smack Shane on the butt with his towel. _Whichever way it goes._


End file.
